Laura and Remington come to a decision.  Murphy bares his soul.

Candid Steele - Part IV

Laura was nodding her answer before her voice had a chance to catch up. 

"Yes, I want you. I always have, but I've been scared to death about what comes afterwards.  I don't know, and I don't like not knowing where I'll stand with you."  Laura scanned his face for some indication that he understood the gravity of the situation.

"I can't answer that, Laura, I simply don't know what will come--afterwards.  I too am taking a risk because I don't know how you will feel later, either.  It's a leap of faith Laura, plain and simple, but I'm standing here, ready to take that leap--with you.  Surely that must speak volumes to to you about my intentions?"

Laura was silent.  She tried to think of another barrier to erect, another possibility that hadn't been thought of in the year that she'd known him.  She tried to come up with something she could put in front of their path to halt forward progress.  She was tapped out.

There wasn't going to be any other flag she could or would raise.  She knew it and he knew the split second that she had come to that realization because it was clearly defined in her eyes.  He sensed it but he refrained from feeling manly triumphant victory.  The one thing he had learned in dealing with their tenuous relationship was never to shout victory until he had crossed the finish line and stood in the winner's circle for more than a few minutes.  Something always, always came up.

"I'm out of excuses," Laura laughed, nervously.

He tilted her face up to kiss her.  "I know." 

His kiss, Laura noted was not victorious in its intent.  It wasn't bold or demanding in nature.  It was soft, questioning, playful and infinitely gentle.  Laura warmed to it immediately, and felt herself respond with ease.  He could have commanded her surrender, instead he asked for her acquiescence and Laura loved him for that.  Some would have thought it trivial, but to Laura, it was a distinction that meant all the difference in the world.

She placed her arms around his neck and leaned in to him as she returned his kiss with equal ardor.  Senses were set to reeling as their kiss extended to hand roaming and body exploration.  Remington was at a loss now to recall just how many times his train of thought had been diverted to postures of this very nature.  Being free to explore Laura's body as he was now being given permission to was an aspiration he never thought to obtain.  He had hoped more times than he dared admit to but he'd all but given up on Laura being anything but a closed book.

Now that same book was wide open to him and he had free reign of all the pages.  Could it get any better than this?  Hell yes, it could!

Remington picked Laura up and held her to him.  She instinctively wrapped her legs around his waist to make the position easier to hold.   She loved the feel of him, and it was wonderful finally being able to admit that this is where she always wanted to be--from the moment they'd met.  Making love with literally the man of her dreams!  She knew when she created Remington Steele that his very blueprint was taken right from everything that made up her "fantasy" lover.   The ideal man that Laura lusted after, but had yet to meet in real life.  He wasn't perfect, far from it, but he had the things that Laura was brutally honest about when she thought of her ideal man.  That he wasn't real was the one thing that was safe about making him her employer.  She knew he'd never be her employer, so it was safe to pull out all the stops.  Now that "ideal man" was doing things to her that were driving her insane.  She couldn't help but laugh at the irony of it.

"My lovemaking is so inadequate it's amusing?"   He queried, eyeing her with interest.

"Don't even think about getting that English ire up, I merely found the irony of this funny.  When I created Remington Steele, I was brutally honest about what...well...what turned me on, because I knew he was fictitious and it was safe to lust after a man that would be my employer, but never my employer."   Laura rushed out.

"You're rambling," 

"I know," she giggled.

"And?"  Remington prompted.

"And here you are live, up close, and very personal and closer to my fantasy then any man I've ever met has been.  Ironic isn't it?"   Laura replied.  Fascinated, she watched his eyes grow even darker in hue.

"Amazingly so.  Well, I have endeavored to live up to your expectations thus far, so I suppose now shouldn't be any different," Remington teased kissing her neck, then nibbling her ear.  Slowly, he traced a path back to her lips before he set Laura back on her feet.

She looked uncertain.  "Remington?"

"Laura?" He responded in question.

"Aren't we going to make love--in this vault?"   Laura wrapped her arms back around his neck.

"I'd say a vault would rank quite high on the list of least mundane places to make love, if there were in fact such a list, but I would have to say that we don't have the time at the moment," he sighed loudly.

"We don't?  Why don't we?  We're locked in a vault, Mr. Steele, just the two of us.  We have just declared our intent to further our relationship, we both just gave the green light for us to make love, and you say we don't have the time?" 

Remington could almost see the fumes seeping out of Laura's body.  "Alas, that is correct, Miss Holt," he smiled as he began smoothing her clothes back in place.

"Why not?"  Laura snapped.  Her frustration at not finishing what they'd started evident.

"Because in just a few minutes I'd say, Murphy is going to come barreling through the door, all beside himself with glee, that he has yet again come to your rescue.  And from me no less," Remington added for good measure.

When Laura would have opened her mouth to protest Remington pulled her to him and kissed her soundly again.

A minute or two later, he lifted his head and tapped Laura on the bridge of her nose.  "Watchdog with a P.I. license, remember?"

Seconds later, they distinctly heard Laura's name being yelled from outside the vault door.

"But, how did you..."  Laura started but never finished as the door opened and Murphy came charging in ready to do battle.

"Hey, we never thought about yelling to see if anyone would hear us, did we?"  Laura turned and asked Remington.

"No.  We never did."  Remington replied in mock disappointment.

"What's funny?"  Murphy questioned as Laura and Remington were reduced to laughter.

###

Laura inhaled her tea, smiling as she took a sip.  Tea.  Her association with Remington actually had her drinking something she swore she'd never like, being such a devout coffee drinker.  As most people addicted to coffee would attest to, you either loved coffee or you loved tea.  Rare was the individual that liked them both.  Laura surmised that she was rare as she took another sip of the aromatic brew.  She preferred cream in her tea, as opposed to lemon, as did the English.  Somehow that hadn't surprised her.

The knock at her door kept her from further pondering the nuances of her Earl Grey.  She slid her feet from under her and stood up from the deep chair she'd burrowed in.  She went to the door and peeped out to see who it was before she opened it.  Light engulfed Murphy as he smiled his greeting.

"Hi, sorry to come over unannounced  but I was in the neighborhood..."

"And thought you'd stop by?"  Laura finished for him.

"Exactly.  If you mind..."  Murphy let the words hang in the air giving Laura time to decide whether he stayed or went.

"Of course not Murph, come in."  Laura said as she stood aside and bid him entrance into her home.

"Would you like something to drink? Coffee, juice or a beer maybe?"  She questioned.

"Is coffee what you're having?"  He questioned.

"Tea, actually," Laura said as she headed toward the kitchen.

Murphy frowned, but refrained from comment.  "Beer's fine."

He made himself at home while Laura went to get his beer.  She returned and joined him on the couch turning sideways toward him as she did.  She always did that when she was sitting next to someone.  It made it easier to see them and less formal.

"So what's up, Murphy?  Rather late for a visit don't you think?  Unless there is something specific on your mind?" 

Laura made an opening for him to alleviate the uncomfortable silence that was usually felt before a person got to the "point" of something.

"Actually, there is something on my mind, Laura.   I know we've been over this before..."

"But, whatever it is, it appears you are going to go over it again." 

"Yes.  I have to, Laura, it's too important not to.  I want to know exactly what went on between you two in that vault, before we got the door open that is.  I could tell something was going on by the way you looked."

"Oh really?  And how exactly did I look?" 

"I don't know...flustered.  Like I had interrupted something.  The question again is, what?"  .

"Look Murph, I'm a grown woman, not some teenager that needs to be chastised for coming home late from a date.  I might also remind you that it is really none of your business what went on when you weren't around," Laura warned.

"So something did happen.  I knew it!  What the hell did Prince Charming try to pull in there!"  Murphy yelled.

"Why are we having this conversation?   Apparently you seem to hear nothing I've said.  I don't need you looking over my shoulder every where I go." 

"You're right, not everywhere you go.  Just when you go somewhere with him.  Look Laura, I'll get straight to the point.  I don't think you should try mixing business with pleasure with that guy.  You haven't known him long enough to be able to honestly say he wouldn't up and run at the first sign of trouble between the two of you--especially after you slept with him."  Murphy said as he placed an arm on Laura's shoulder.

"Murphy, you are way out of line here.  Just what right do you think you have to second guess my relationship with him or anyone else for that matter!  Whether or not I sleep with someone is only your business if I confide in you.  Which I might add, I did not!"  Laura said as she stood up to distance herself from him.

"I have every right to care about you Laura, I'm your friend for God's sake!" 

"A friend, I might add, whose opinion I did not ask for!  I am not some greenhorn fresh out of high school.  I am a grown woman, with grown up feelings, and the intelligence to be able to deal with whatever ramifications ensue from those actions,"  Laura said hotly.

"My God, you are going through with this aren't you?  Laura don't.  I can't bear to see you get hurt by trusting that smarmy con artist.  I care too much to see it happen."

Laura eyed Murphy as if somehow seeing him clearly for once.  Her eyes widened in shock.

"Why?"  Laura whispered.

"Why what?"  Murphy said looking decidely uncomfortable.

"Don't play games, Murphy.  You know what I'm asking you.  Why do you care so much what happens to me?"

Murphy knew when he drove over to Laura's house that he would have to bare his soul in order to get her to re-think her involvement with him.   He took a deep breath and plunged ahead.

"Because I love you, Laura.  I have since we met at our first internship.  I was an ass not to tell you so long ago, but I wasn't sure how you'd take it.  That's why I jumped at the opportunity to work for you at the agency.  When you offered me the job as your associate I saw it as an opportunity to have you get to know me better.  To give us a chance to develop in to something more than just associates.  I thought it was leading right up to that until he showed up.  I knew the moment he decided to stick around, the minute I saw you two together that he had an ulterior motive planned.  I knew the only reason he stayed around was to add another feather to his cap.  He won't stay for good Laura.  I know his type believe me Laura.  You are better off with me.  I care about you more than words can say.  I was hoping in time that you would come to care for me."  Murphy finished pointedly.

Laura stood fixed to her spot.  She knew he'd felt something for her but she wasn't prepared for his declaration of love.  And now that she'd heard it.  She was mad as hell!

"Well I suppose you would know "his" type Murphy.  YOU are that type!"  Laura said as her temper flared.

Murphy tried to protest but Laura wouldn't let him get a word out.

"You love me, Murphy?  Really?  Well, you think that love you just spoke of gives you the right to try to govern every aspect of my life?  You say the man posing as Remington Steele has an ulterior motive?  What about YOURS?!  You claim he's just sticking around until he outwits me, and out-maneuvers me into his bed?  Gee, Murphy, you don't think YOU are doing the same thing?  You accepted my job offer to be nearer to me, didn't you?  To see what might have developed between us given time.  It seems to me that you were the one hoping to end up in my bed.  Then a new man arrives on the scene, one that I just happened to become attracted to, just happen to be the wrinkle in your picture perfect plan! And you lecture me about not mixing business and pleasure with him, when that is exactly what you intended for the two of us!  Well, how dare you!  I suppose that in all my years of excellent grades, college education, experience being a professional and licensed private investigator, I have somehow misplaced my brain and the sense God gave me.  I don't even know what's right for me, who is right for me.   No, I need my guardian angel, Murphy Michaels, to clear the path of all would be wrong doers so that I can have my one true love, which conveniently happens to be you, finally declare his intent!  That isn't love Murphy, that's manipulation, and I am not impressed!" 

Murphy stood there looking at her in utter disbelief.   He had never prepared for this reaction.  "Laura, that isn't how it is.  I do love you.  Truly love you.  I would never try to make that appear to be something it isn't.  I had no hidden agenda coming to work for you.  I did that because you are one hell of a detective, and we make a good professional team.  You are right, I had hoped that good chemistry would spill over into something more.  But you have to believe me, Laura, while some of my feelings toward the great Remington Steele are that of jealousy, deep down I just don't trust the guy on principal for his past deeds.  I just don't think he will leave your heart in tact.  I don't want to see another of your relationships turn sour and leave you devastated."  Murphy grasp her shoulders and bent to kiss her.   Laura saw it coming and pulled away from him.

"Murphy, in all my tirade just now, did you once hear me reciprocate the love you claim you have for me? No.  I didn't reciprocate Murphy, because I don't love you like that.  I never, ever have.  As for how many of my relationships turn sour, I am not counting them Murphy, so why should you?  There is no set number of relationships a person is in before the right one comes along.  And if I am torn apart after one ends that means I truly cared about the person and that is a natural part of the healing process isn't it?  I don't need a guardian Murphy.  I need a friend and a business associate.  If you can't be just that to me than perhaps you and I need to go our separate ways.  Whether you or anyone else likes it or not.  I happened to be attracted to him, and he to me.   Where it goes from there will remain to be seen, but I refuse to second guess myself, and I sure as hell don't expect someone calling themselves my friend to either.  The choice is yours Murphy, so what's it going to be?" 

Murphy stood there a minute just looking at her.   He'd had such grand hopes, but they had somehow all gone awry.  Without a backwards glance ,Murphy turned on his heel and walked out of Laura's house.  Laura stood staring after him, speechless.  After a few minutes she finally sank down on the couch with tears in her eyes.

###

Remington was sound asleep when he heard the buzzer at his door.  At first, he thought he was dreaming so he turned over and attempted to block out the sound.  After the sound intruded on the silence again, he knew it wasn't a dream.  He cautiously got out of bed since he was still partially asleep and pulled on his silk robe.  He made his way to the door and flung it open with a terse, "This bloody well better be important."  He was so disgruntled at having his sleep interrupted that he hadn't even looked out the peep hole.

Seeing Laura in the door way had him immediately alert.  Seeing tears in her eyes had him bloody well awake!

"Laura, what is it?  What's happened that's upset you, eh?"  Remington questioned as he looked at her tear stained face.  

He had never seen Laura cry, and Lord knows there had been a few occasions over the past year where it was warranted.  Laura couldn't hold her composure any longer.  She dissolved into his arms in a heap of coat, hair and tears.  He caught her to him, and pulled her into his apartment.  Once the door was shut he leaned back against it and held her tightly to him.

"Say we made the right decision.  We did didn't we?  I mean, it was the only one we could have made, right?"  Laura babbled.

Remington didn't need to know what "decision" she was referring to.  He knew exactly what she meant.  The trouble was what had transpired between the time he'd left her and now that could possibly reduce Laura to a quaking mass of tears and hysteria.  He answered her the only way that would have gotten through to her clouded mind.  He picked her up, held her close and headed for his bedroom.

To be continued...

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